I didn't want to be different...

I think that a lot of people who have known me for any length of time are under the impression that I like being different and that I choose to quite deliberately because I enjoy it. Don't get me wrong, I am absolutely proud of who I am and I like myself, but some days I wish as much as anyone to just be "normal" (whatever that means) and to fit in with everybody else. But the fact is I'm not, so at different times I have needed to seek out groups where I could at least feel normal for a short time.

Listening to many of Bob and Jenna's podcasts and reading from much more articulated and learned people than myself such as Gary Francione and Karen Davis, I see so many parallels between my "alternative" parenting style and my decision (finally!) to go vegan. So often the logic for eating animals or using them for other purposes is that they don't care, they don't know any better, even that they can't feel pain (???) For those that don't know, I've been what is commonly known as an "attachment parent" with my son. He was breastfed until he was 4, we *never* allowed him to cry alone without comfort and he has never and he will never be hit by either of his parents. A friend of mine used to have in her signature on our parenting board something along the lines of "attachment parenting - the bizarre concept that children are people too".... When people talk about leaving their baby to cry so they can "learn to sleep" I honestly wonder how they can possibly justify it. Just because your baby is unable to say, "Hey Mum, I'm scared and alone and when you leave me I don't know if you'll ever come back and I need you to hold me" then somehow it's okay to let him or her cry. After all they're only a baby, they don't understand, they won't remember...

I see this as so completely analogous to the way animals are treated in our society. If you don't have a voice, then stuff you, nobody cares what you feel. Bob often talks in the podcast about how when people use the justification that it's okay to eat and use animals because they are not as intelligent, etc, etc that we could use the same logic to justify eating babies. While obviously no sane adult really believes we would be justified in eating babies, similar logic is certainly used by people everywhere to treat babies as less than human in various ways.

When I had Mitchell, I knew that I could never leave him to cry alone. Because of the general consensus in "society" I thought that this would make me a bad parent and mean that he would never learn to sleep. Looking back I cannot believe how ridiculous this sounds, but there you go. Mitchell was cuddled or breastfed to sleep for 4 years, but you know what, he certainly knows how to sleep and mostly with no hassles whatsoever. And sometimes he still sleeps in my bed, and sometimes he doesn't (mostly not these days). When his Dad's away he tends to want the extra security of sleeping closer to me, but seriously, what's wrong with that? Why should it matter if you a 1 day old, 1 year old, 10 years old or an adult. If you feel that you need / want some company, some comfort, why shouldn't you be able to have that?

By the same token, why should a cow not be entitled to graze at will, entitled to keep her baby with her until it is naturally weaned and grown and ready to move on, and ultimately, why should she not be allowed to live out her natural life? So that we can drink milk that was never intended for the human body? How on earth can that be okay?

The same analogy goes for any animal on this planet. Why should a chicken not be allowed to roam and peck at food when they are hungry? Why should a male chick have to be ground up at birth because he's no good to us all important humans? And if you believe that free range chickens are really any better off, then have a look at Karen's site here.

Looking back, I can't believe that I was so naive, and I completely believe that there are no excuses. I have no excuses and I am responsible for the decisions I made in the past to partake in the dairy and egg industries by eating their products. But organisations like PETA also have a lot to answer for. Reading their web site had me convinced that yes, veganism is ideal but free range eggs and dairy, etc was still okay... For an organisation that calls itself People for the ETHICAL Treatment of Animals, I'm not quite sure how they can justify their stance, but I guess that is just what comes with becoming such a large organisation and now ultimately being more about money than anything else. To *celebrate* that in Canada KFC are gassing chickens to death instead of electrocuting them, well, frankly it makes no sense to me whatsoever. I just don't get it, can anybody explain???

Well that's a bit more of the swirling thoughts in my head relating to my journey of discovering exactly what kind of vegan I am and want to be. I really do want to thank Bob and Jenna (not that I expect them to read this! maybe I'll leave a voicemail one of these days ;) ) for their forums, their podcast, and they're book that I'm still making my way through. No, I didn't want to be different, and I didn't want to be a "freak", but the Vegan Freaks have helped me to at the same time feel less freaky, and embrace my freakdom. I'm now proud to call myself a Vegan Freak, as, frankly, I'm in great company :)